It’s WINTER! Who knew?

So they said we had a 20% chance of flurries last night. And then it kept changing to 30% and then 60% and then 90%/Snow Advisory/1-3 inches of accumulation. And, well look.

And it’s still snowing. It’s pretty! And since I won’t be leaving the house (Ryan has forbidden it. AFTER he drove all the way to work.), I’m still in my bathrobe. And I haven’t had a shower. Unfortunately not leaving the house also means I have to make my own coffee. And I won’t get to enjoy the baby-soothing benefits of rides in the car. The carseat has magical qualities.

Charlie doesn’t seem phased by the snow.

Charlie says “It’s good to be a gangsta.”

I want to take him out in his full body fleece coat thing to take some pictures, but then I would have to put on pants and maybe even take off my cozy bathrobe. Meh.

Something is wrong with me

Clearly, the rational part of my brain was delivered with the baby. Ryan called today from work to tell me he stopped by the church where Charlie will be staying three days a week during the day so I can go back to school (THREE FREAKING DAYS). As he described how nice the room looked and how there are only three babies per teacher and how they are certified by the state I could not stop crying. In fact, I can barely even tell you about it. In every other area I am still my old cynical self (like changing the station whenever that damn Christmas Shoes song comes on the radio and getting more worked up over a Tech first down than well pretty much anything that is supposed to make normal people feel all warm and fuzzy. Except for patriotic music on the Fourth of July and the part where the veterans stand up when they play their song? Yeah, don’t get me started).

It will be great for him. He’ll make tiny friends and learn things from his teachers and all that (and get all his major infections before he reaches one year old. Poor sweet innocent little baby what is your mama doing to you?). I love the idea that he’ll be a little independent (forget who I am) and have some new experiences (hang around with the wrong crowd of no good hoodlum babies who will introduce him to cigarettes). It’s just the thought of dropping him off with strangers and then walking out and going to work that is a little terrifying. Please leave supportive comments.

So I figured the best possible way to handle the stress the mere thought of taking Charlie to childcare (part time three days a week oh my gosh what the heck is the matter with me snap out of it!) was to drink a Peppermint Mocha from Starbucks and eat a giant chocolate chip cookie. Charlie got lots of compliments at Starbucks because he was fast asleep in his stroller (mostly because of the bumpy sidewalk outside but also because he is a perfect little baby [who turns me into a sappy pile of mush. but at least not a pile of mush covered in breastmilk anymore woo hoo!]). [And no, I am not cheating on the coffee shop because I had a gift card from my sister who is the manager of a Starbucks so it totally doesn't count plus the coffee shop is far away and not right next to the grocery store] Mmm, I am enjoying my Peppermint Mocha. On a completely unrelated note, I’ve decided that post-pregnancy “curves” are sexy and should be cultivated.

Finally, Growey McEats-A-Lot has outgrown the Christening outfit I found for him. Sigh, back to the drawing board.

Things that are annoying (and not annoying)

#1 Target Online Photolab
Not only do they not have their own website (and make you sign up for Yahoo Photos), they don’t offer 3.5 x 5 inch prints. So my really awesome Christmas card idea will be more difficult because the cards I bought and pre-addressed are too small for a 4×6. Our solution is to use a less perfect picture of Charlie that Ryan will then hand crop using a paper cutter at school. Also, the nice new Target by our house is not on the list of available stores for pickup, which means I have to go to the old Target on the other side of town. The Target where you almost die trying to enter the parking lot because you have to cross three lanes of traffic instantaneously after getting off the freeway. Get ready for a vocabulary lesson Mr. Charlie.

#2 Dumb Sidewalks
Charlie and I went for an hour-long walk today. (Yeah, it was AWESOME. The weather was perfect and he slept the whole time and I wasn’t sitting on the couch watching “Christina’s Court”) The only problem, and I’ve never noticed this before, is that the sidewalks in my neighborhood don’t have ramps at the corners. So every time I got to an alley (about every 50 feet when going N or S) or the end of a block I had to lower the stroller off the curb then pick it up again on the other side. Fortunately this didn’t phase Charlie who slept the whole time and is STILL sleeping in his stroller now. Yay!

Things that are not annoying? Lansinoh disposable nursing pads (aka diapers for your boobs). No more dripping! I even took the towels out of my bed. My quality of life (like leaving the house without “bullseyes” on my shirts and not smelling like spoiled milk all the time) is about to improve considerably. I am so excited.

Also not annoying? I live in a town where in one week you can have highs in the 70s, thunderstorms with hail, highs in the 30s, and a chance of “wintery mix”.

Covenant Women’s Spa-spital

Today Charlie and I went back to the hospital for a weight check (Charlie was weighed, not me). I felt like saying “He’s a newborn, I promise!” when I saw the other (tiny, bald) babies there. Charlie now weighs 10 lb 7 oz up from his birthweight of 8 lb 10 oz. When they weighed him the nurse exclaimed “Ooh! This one’s eating REALLY well!” As usual he showed his distaste for public nudity by peeing and spitting up on the scale. Other than that he was a little sweetheart and slept in his stroller while I talked to the nurses about my, um, nursing issues (am I going to be sleeping on towels forever? Are they supposed to get so full? Why the hell do they hurt so bad?).

Anyway, being at the hospital today and visiting a friend there last week made me realize how much I would like to move back in on a long term basis. Where else do you have babysitting, food, drinks, and fancy prescription pain medication available at the push of a button? Where else do they require nothing of you but sitting in bed and admiring your baby? Why did the food have to be so darn good?? I even had cable and a lake view! Home is nice, but a lot more work. No matter how many times I hit my alarm clock, no disembodied voice fills the room asking what I need. Sigh. We still have Charlie’s little hat and shirt that he wore there. Maybe we can sneak back in. They wouldn’t notice the giant baby in the nursery right?

Right now he is in his bouncer trying not to fall asleep. It’s really fun to watch. He keeps kicking his legs as his eyelids get heavier and heavier and letting out just one tiny quiet “waa” at a time. He should be asleep soon. Then it’s time to clean up around here a little because…ew.

Well I knew the day was coming…

Today Charlie and I ventured out so I could buy some jeans. I loaded a few pairs on top of him in the stroller and went into the dressing room. I wriggled into the first pair, zipped them up (feat of incredible strength), turned around to see how they looked in the mirror, and that’s when I saw it. I am officially that girl who leaves the house with a giant spitup stain on her shirt. It added a nice symmetry to the stain left by my constantly leaking right boob.

Anyway, I found some jeans that go on and zip, but it’s not the best I have ever looked in a pair of pants. Jeans are a cruel reality check for someone like me who has spent the last 2.5 weeks admiring myself in the mirror thinking “DANG that belly went away FAST I wouldn’t be surprised if I actually wear a size SMALLER now.” It’s easy to think that way when you are not pregnant but continuing to wear maternity pants. Besides, it’s not the belly that’s the problem, it’s my legs and butt and other body parts that have absolutely nothing to do with nurturing a fetus and that only got huge because I couldn’t keep my hands off the cookies.

Anyway, I have to go because the baby is awake. Ryan-the-best-husband-there-has-ever-been is on his way home and is bringing me Caffiene to stave off my withdrawl headache. My sister and brother-in-law and parents are on their way here too. I also have to make brownies to cover up the breastmilk/poo/sweaty dog/mystery-garage-smell smell we have going on up in here.

Girls! Girls! Girls!

Since today would be the first time Charlie and I met my new best kid-having hippy friends at La Leche League, I wanted to make a good impression. I gave Charlie a bath, put him in his cute frog diaper cover and a sweet blue sleeper, put on a nice skirt and sandals (wanted to fit the part of the hippy La Leche League stay-at-home-mom), and left early so I could be sure to get there on time. I even remembered to write down the address and room number and take it with me. I was the picture of organization and inner poise.

Well about halfway over there a whole lot of “La Leche” started soaking through my shirt and all that inner poise went right out the window. First, I made a wrong turn (how? How how how? The meeting was at a church I attended for OVER A YEAR). Then when I arrived at the church and parked at the west end of the building (as instructed) I found the door locked. I struggled getting Charlie into the sling (had to be the sling because my new attachment parenting hippy friends would frown on Charlie being confined in a car seat plus it covered one boob, not the one with the most noticable wet mark, but better than nothing) because it was windy and my skirt was blowing around my head and I was flustered because I was late and gosh isn’t it great that kids don’t start repeating the things you say until they’re a little older? So with Charlie nestled into the sling in a very uncomfortable looking position I set about finding an unlocked door. I finally found one about nine miles away from my car and went inside where Charlie suddenly realized just how uncomfortable he was and began protesting loudly. I dropped my handbag, pulled him out of the sling, wrapped him in a blanket, then did a deep kneebend to retrieve my handbag and went looking for the classroom. The classroom was pretty much just opposite the locked door from my car.

Everyone there was SO nice. And they all loved Charlie. There was another small baby there (who had the same rocker hair as Charlie) and several other kids and toddlers running around and eating pieces of fruit (organic, free-range fruit I’m sure) while the mamas talked breastfeeding (and breastfed their babies, I was disappointed Charlie had just been fed because I could have joined in). We broke into small discussion groups and I was paired with the other lady with the newborn. When the leader came over to ask us how we were doing I noticed that the other newborn mama spoke in the same kind of crazed “I’m laughing and smiling so much because if I don’t I’m going to start crying again.” tone that I have been using off and on since Charlie was born.

Charlie was perfect. He slept the whole time in the blanket my friend S made him and I was so proud of him (he was most certainly the cutest baby there). Everyone told me I was doing a great job because he was gaining so much weight and gave me some tips for preventing pain. They learned our names and praised Charlie’s new chubbiness. They even invited me to their holiday pot luck dinner. I like my new friends. Please don’t tell them that Charlie is currently sleeping in his car seat. Or that we have a crib for him to sleep in at night. Or that we eat red meat.

The official Christmas stocking arrives!!

Charlie’s Christmas stocking came in the mail today. My aunt, B, has been making them for every new family member since before I was born. I used to help my mom make the decorations with felt and sequins occasionally as a kid. This year we had two additions, Charlie and my brother-in-law, N. Now they are both official family members. I am SO excited. Thank you, B!!!!!

You made me sad.

If anyone else has any comments to make about my academic progress, I have only one thing to say to you:

He is so much better and more important than any degree could HOPE to be. But I am going to finish just to spite you.

Why not, we’re the parents right?

We were very poor examples for Charlie this morning. It started when we slept too late to go to church (which starts at 11 did I mention?). That couldn’t really be avoided because Charlie was feeling extra chipper and alert between three and nine in the morning and needed help with his Calculus lessons, so we were tired. Since church was out, Ryan and I took Charlie to Sonic for brunch. I had the breakfast toaster sandwich and Ryan had the Super Sonic BreakFeast Burrito and we both got large caffienated beverages (Ryan Dr. Pepper and me tea). We sat in the car as a little family for about an hour enjoying our brunch and listening to songs on the iPod. We’ve started developing Charlie’s ear for the classics. He is developing a taste for Van Morrison, The Beatles, Simon and Garfunkel, Willie Nelson, and Johnny Cash (and Greenday and Kanye West and Flogging Molly). After we finished our sandwiches, I said “Want to get an ice cream cone?” To my surprise Ryan shrugged and said “Sure!” and started burrowing through the cupholders for change. I said “Why not, we’re the parents now!!” And shoot, it was noon somewhere! Man it was great. I realized last night that Ryan and I were making an effort to be extra polite to eachother, which is good, but I really missed the ease of our pre-child relationship. Turns out it’s still there, just covered by a layer of fatigue and breastmilk.

[Which, I'd like to thank C from La Leche League who I spoke to on Friday and who told me that some babies can nurse lying down (her kids learned to do it at 3 and 6 weeks, Charlie's advanced like that). Greatest trick EVER. Not only did it NOT HURT for some reason, Charlie took to it like a duck to water. That kid could nurse standing on his head. He does not care how the food gets to him, he just wants FOOD and he will suck on anything (arm, neck, wrong part of boob) to get it (I have a nice hicky from this. Ryan's jealous.). Anyway, C from La Leche League? Be expecting an awkward gift of wine and chocolate from me at the next meeting. Signed, SoreNips224.]

This week is Thanksgiving! Charlie’s first holiday (except Veteran’s Day and Election Day)! I can’t wait to teach him all about the Mayflower and Plymouth Rock and the Pilgrims and Indians and the hard winter and the stuffing and pie and turkey and mashed potatoes and pie and green bean casserole and pie. (Did anyone watch that Food Network show where they used leftover green bean casserole to make a fancy meal with portabello mushrooms? Becaaaauuuussseee…obviously that woman has never experienced the exquisite joy of eating cold green bean casserole out of the tupperware standing up by the open refrigerator door in your undies in the middle of the night.) Anyone know where I can find a secondhand Pilgrim costume (including shoes with buckles preferably) in size 0-3 Mo?

Mr. Floppy Head